Tammy Bruce: Somebody Stole Somebody's Girlfriend

Somebody Stole Somebody's Girlfriend

Funny, in the regular world, this sort of fight happens just about six months after the U-Haul has come and gone. The fact that it took 40-some years is amazing.

Italian archbishop closes convent after nuns come to blows

A convent in southern Italy is being shut down after a quarrel among its last three remaining nuns ended in blows, press reports said Sunday.

Sisters Annamaria and Gianbattista, reportedly upset about their mother superior's authoritarian ways, scratched her in the face and threw her to the ground at Santa Clara convent near Bari in an incident in July that was kept quiet until now.

Archbishop Giovanni Battista Pichierri tried to reconcile the nuns but finally decided in late August that they had "clearly lost their religious vocation" and asked the Vatican for permission to close the convent.

Was it the Curve Magazine or the DVD of "Desert Hearts" that gave it away?

Sisters Annamaria and Gianbattista moved to another convent, but Sister Liliana barricaded herself inside, refusing to leave, the reports said, adding that she suspected Battista Pichierri of planning to cede the convent to another community...

What are the chances it's West Hollywood?

Oh, and while we're at it, let's cast the movie! I say Charlotte Rampling and Jacqueline Bisset for Annamaria and Gianbattista and Sophia Loren for Liliana. Other ideas?

Posted by Tammy · October 1, 2007 11:29 AM · Permalink
Cultural Commentary | Faith/The Divine | Humor

Comments

I'm sure that Sisters Annamaria and Gianbattista will do their "Personal Best" to get along better with others at their new convent in West Hollywood.

Posted by: Tink at October 1, 2007 12:33 PM

The windup nun was a riot enough, but can you imagine a windup imam? They would be ready to shut down the Internet.

It had to have been "Desert Hearts", hmmm, maybe "Bound".

Posted by: Perry at October 1, 2007 12:49 PM

You made very fine casting suggestions, Tammy. Wouldn't change a thing at all! Just please let me direct it - or at least be the cinematographer.

Posted by: artgal at October 1, 2007 01:20 PM

Has there ever been a film with older hot lesbians getting frisky with each other in front of the camera? It's always younger hot lesbians getting frisky with each other in mainstream films, I don't recall a film with lesbians over the age of 35 even, when it comes to mainstream films. I don't think the L-Word ever featured any couples where either partner was over the age of 50, either, but I haven't watched the last few seasons, so I could be wrong.

There would seem to be room for a film to study the special relationships that hot women over the age of 50 (and in Sophia's case over 70) have with each other in as explicit detail as those actresses will allow. Given the religious and social context of this story, a film would seem to be a no-brainer. Great suggestion Tammy (and get Pedro Almodóvar to direct, he already did Dark Habits, long ago).

(and you'd probably look stunning even in a habit, so have you ever thought of acting in a small supporting role, say opposite Mila Jovovich?)

Posted by: XWL at October 1, 2007 01:25 PM

A convent in West Hollywood? Huh? Uh, that's supposed to be a joke, right?

Since we're all having a little fun at the nuns expense, here are my casting suggestions:

Jane Lynch and Camryn Manheim for Annamaria and Gianbattista and Rosie O'Donnell for Liliana.
They're all 50-somethings, right?

Posted by: girlsgotrhythm at October 1, 2007 06:32 PM