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Maynard goes to the movies

Mel Gibson is a cinematic genius. That’s the long and short of it.

Apocalypto is a violent, intense, disturbing odyssey that will not be for all tastes. It tells the story of a rural 16th-century Mayan tribesman caught in a terrible predicament.

It all sounded much too strong for the Tammy, who announced her intention to instead attend Happy Feet. Maybe it’s a guy thing, but the trailers were enough to convince me to steer clear of this sappy, preachy penguin flick. I recognize in both “Apocalypto” and “Happy Feet” a potential to make me puke. But “Apocalypto” evokes a hairy, sweaty, masculine sort of regurgitant, whereas “Happy Feet” seems closer to Bambi-esque schmaltz. Perhaps your lady-friend will swoon, but will she respect you in the morning? No, a real man will drag his gal to “Apocalypto”, so as to remind the both of them what a real man is.

The film begins with a tribal hunt. The circumstances are primitive and alien, yet oddly familiar (for example, whatever your culture or ethnicity or era, you may be menaced by an annoying mother-in-law).

And then the idyll becomes a nightmare. I’ll say no more of the plot; you know all you need to know.

I was riveted. But don’t go unless you want to be challenged. And leave the young or immature kids at home. This film earns its “R”.

You’ll find summaries of other reviews (which are generally enthusiastic) at Metacritic. There’s also some interesting commentary and analysis on Wikipedia. But they’ve posted a lot of “spoiler” information there, so don’t visit unless you’ve either seen the film or don’t care about being given the complete plot. (Personally, I’d compare this film — in a very broad way — to Fellini’s Satyricon. Does anyone remember that one?)

A few sundry details and comments follow, for them that wants more…

Part of the fascination of “Apocalypto” is its total immersion into this strange, surreal world. Just as the characters in “Passion of the Christ” spoke in their native languages, so do these characters speak the Yukatek Maya dialect. Dialogue is subtitled. Gibson wanted to create an aura of authenticity, and he achieved it brilliantly.

I do have one fundamental gripe. “Apocalypto” opens with a quote from the historian and philosopher Will Durant: “A great civilization is not conquered from without until it has destroyed itself from within.” As valid as that idea may be, and as fascinating as the story is, I can’t say I felt a strong connection between the quote and the dramatic events. Others may disagree, but that’s my take. I’ll skip the details of that argument here.

One other quick note; a belated comment on Gibson’s DUI incident. I’m not entirely sure what to make of that episode. Shall I simply take his words at face value and regard the booze as “truth serum”? Or do I make excuses for inexcusable behavior? I find myself leaning toward the latter, because the whole event seemed so cartoonish that I can’t really take it seriously.

But perhaps I’m being naïve; after all, large segments of the world believe in the veracity of The Protocols of the Elders of Zion, which also seems much too ridiculous for any sane creature to accept.

However, I found it interesting that the arresting officer, against whom Gibson launched his tirade, was in fact Jewish. And then, when they got to the station, Gibson immediately taunted an approaching female officer thusly: “What are you looking at, sugar [breasts]?” So I might speculate this was a generic “mean stupid drunk” outburst, in which Gibson launched the usual crude insults at whatever target appeared before him. The Jew gets the anti-Semitic rant; the woman gets the misogynist heckling. Whatever your race, creed, color, sex, orientation, religion, or species, he’s got you covered.

From such a talented artist, we would expect nothing less, don’t you think?

Also, I see less damage coming out of Gibson’s meltdown than I do of so many other Hollywood screw-ups, with their dysfunctional lives and the hateful toxicity of their politics, all of which they proudly insist upon sharing with us. Gibson has been roundly condemned, and he has moved to set things right. When will, for example, Sean Penn or Rosie O’Donnell do the same?